Who needs the dump?

I remember as a young Fox making a weekly sojourn to the one and only Bradley County landfill or as we knew it "The Dump". The best part was the miniscule chance that we might also visit the animal shelter, aka the pound, that adjoins the dump. As a child I never really did the math about why the pound was so conveniently located beside the dump. So enough about the reason I enjoyed going, but on to the the real reason for this masterpiece. Since my family has relocated to the Mousecreek the need for the dump trips have almost vanished. I know what you are thinking, the city picks up the trash now. That really only covers household refuse of the common type. My family produces garbage at an astonishing rate. I would wager we create as many cubic yards of stinkiness as any family within 100 miles. The other items we dispose of don't fall into the common household variety. I'm talking about big items like broken washing machines, old swing sets, box springs, mattresses, loose wire, scrap wood, and a 12 pack of diet cokes. All of the items I just listed were thrown to the side of the road for the city monthly pickup except for the cokes. These items last only hours in our neighborhood. It's like ants to a picnic, as soon as the items hit the road various people stop and grab them. We must dispose of some really good stuff because most of it's gone before daylight. This brings me to the 12 pack of cokes and how they went missing. I was unloading some groceries from the family van and couldn't carry everything on one load. I sat the 12 pack just inside the magical line of free for the taking. I return from my 2 minute jaunt inside and the cokes are gone. I mean vanished without a trace with no hope of their safe return. So the rule around the Mousecreek house is if it's left near the road it's fair game. I have no need for the dump because we have the Bermuda Triangle of refuse at our house.